This I present without further intrusion as my words to you, my friends.
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Continuing the story of the mercenary call center
When I was in training, it was a very diverse group. There were people chosen to be tech support right out of the gate, but tech support at this company was just reading a different script. They were chosen seemingly at random and included all of the oldest people in the class.
Training was about three weeks and then a fourth week in "nesting" where you had coaches roaming the aisles to help you if you had questions. Some people quit while we were still training, and then on our first day on the phones there was a whole herd of people who marched straight to HR to quit right at the first break of the day. The job wasn't that bad. By the time I got fired there were precisely four people from my original group still working at the company. My very first call was an activation call. The customer was badgering me about stuff and then his dad grabbed the phone and asked, "What about X X X?" He made it three words like that. I told him about pay per view and the Playboy Channel and he insisted that a competitor gave it for free. I told him there was no way that was true and he just passed the phone back.
So I got hurt while at Basic and my paperwork was lost so in the eyes of the Army I wasn't really injured and I needed to stop being a wuss about my broken knee. I had to get surgery with my own health insurance, but I did get the Army to pay for the surgery at least. It just took 9 months. After I recovered from the surgery I had to go through initial training again for some stupid reason. It was then that I ran out of fucks to give and got really stupid. I discovered that there was no firewall on the company internet and got even more stupid. I got reported four times for looking at porn at work. I'm sure many more people saw me but didn't bother reporting it. I was fired three days before my wedding. It was an exciting time.
Training was about three weeks and then a fourth week in "nesting" where you had coaches roaming the aisles to help you if you had questions. Some people quit while we were still training, and then on our first day on the phones there was a whole herd of people who marched straight to HR to quit right at the first break of the day. The job wasn't that bad. By the time I got fired there were precisely four people from my original group still working at the company. My very first call was an activation call. The customer was badgering me about stuff and then his dad grabbed the phone and asked, "What about X X X?" He made it three words like that. I told him about pay per view and the Playboy Channel and he insisted that a competitor gave it for free. I told him there was no way that was true and he just passed the phone back.
So I got hurt while at Basic and my paperwork was lost so in the eyes of the Army I wasn't really injured and I needed to stop being a wuss about my broken knee. I had to get surgery with my own health insurance, but I did get the Army to pay for the surgery at least. It just took 9 months. After I recovered from the surgery I had to go through initial training again for some stupid reason. It was then that I ran out of fucks to give and got really stupid. I discovered that there was no firewall on the company internet and got even more stupid. I got reported four times for looking at porn at work. I'm sure many more people saw me but didn't bother reporting it. I was fired three days before my wedding. It was an exciting time.
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Cube Monkey Chronicles: Every Story has a beginning, but it's usually in the middle anyway.
I got my first call center job when I was 19 years old. I had been out of boot camp for six months and the case of instant ramen I had bought to nourish myself during the job hunt was almost empty. My previous work experience consisted of working part time in a toy store in the mall, and helping out my friend's step dad sell ammunition and ammunition accessories at gun shows. In short, I had no idea what I was getting into.
The particular call center I was going to work at was an outsource call center, meaning that they were essentially mercenaries of customer service, contracting out to larger companies and handling customer calls. This center was really a complex, about a half mile's worth of buildings dedicated to this purpose. Several companies contracted with this company.
I was hired on to work customer service for a satellite TV company, and later, tech support, then international support, then a specialized team of people who helped customers get access to the major local networks if they couldn't normally, like in a rural area or if they have satellite in their camping RV. By the time I got fired from that company I was logged in to five call banks at once, earning a cool $8.69. This was 2003 dollars, mind you.
This company made it nice and clear that if you didn't show up, they didn't mind. They would gladly let you quit before firing you. In fact, I didn't get fired until 18 months later for looking at porn at work. I know it's stupid, but I was 20. I was stupid. I did learn a lot about life at that place though. For example, the first taste of anti-military sentiment, even though I was in Utah. My coworkers thought that it was weird that I was in the Army Reserves and so they didn't like talking to me and never invited me to their team parties and stuff. Just because I was a soldier. More to come, dear reader.
The particular call center I was going to work at was an outsource call center, meaning that they were essentially mercenaries of customer service, contracting out to larger companies and handling customer calls. This center was really a complex, about a half mile's worth of buildings dedicated to this purpose. Several companies contracted with this company.
I was hired on to work customer service for a satellite TV company, and later, tech support, then international support, then a specialized team of people who helped customers get access to the major local networks if they couldn't normally, like in a rural area or if they have satellite in their camping RV. By the time I got fired from that company I was logged in to five call banks at once, earning a cool $8.69. This was 2003 dollars, mind you.
This company made it nice and clear that if you didn't show up, they didn't mind. They would gladly let you quit before firing you. In fact, I didn't get fired until 18 months later for looking at porn at work. I know it's stupid, but I was 20. I was stupid. I did learn a lot about life at that place though. For example, the first taste of anti-military sentiment, even though I was in Utah. My coworkers thought that it was weird that I was in the Army Reserves and so they didn't like talking to me and never invited me to their team parties and stuff. Just because I was a soldier. More to come, dear reader.
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